Happy Birthday Mitchell!  It's hard to believe that our oldest son turns 16 today, where has the time gone?  I feel so blessed to be his momma!  So many things have changed since Mitchell was born, the biggest change, my parents are no longer here to celebrate with us.  They were so excited to welcome their first grandchild into this world.  I can still hear my mom's gasp of excitement as Mitchell arrived.  Both his grandma's were there to witness the miracle of his birth, and his grandpa's were in the waiting area close by.  What an exciting time!  I can remember having those terrifying thoughts of, "What the heck do I do now?  I'm not qualified to take care of this helpless baby!"  Here we are sixteen years later and I still have days that I wonder what the heck I'm doing.  Yet, God doesn't always call the qualified, he qualifies the called.  I'm hanging onto that notion!

I've been a mom for sixteen years and there have been days I clearly understand why some animals eat their young. We have had many ups and downs and we are still learning everyday.  I've made many mistakes, but thank God his grace is always sufficient, Romans 3:23-24  "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,  and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."  Each day is a gift a chance to extend and receive the grace of God. 

For several years Ken and I helped out with youth group at church.  One of our favorite lessons to teach the kids was about God's grace.  Ken always got a thrill of rigging the teams and the game so that a certain group of kids would win the game and then by extending grace to the losing team, they received the prize even though they didn't deserve it.  I can almost guarantee that most if not all of those kids learned what grace means. 

As I look with great anticipation to wrapping my arms around our Anna Grace, I have some of the same fleeting thoughts I had when Mitchell was born.  "What the heck am I doing?  I'm a momma to three boys, I not sure I know how to be a momma to a little girl!"  In the midst of those thoughts I can hear God's small still voice reminding me he qualifies the called.  So I continue to put my trust and faith in the creator of the universe, the Alpha and the Omega, the Great I Am, my savior and redeemer, Jesus Christ.


But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Matthew 6:33

It's the day after Christmas and it will be one week tomorrow that we accepted the referral of our precious Anna Grace (Yujun Yang).  God is so merciful and faithful! We could've never imagined a year ago that we would be so anxious to travel to China!  It's been a whirlwind of papers and emotions.

We started this journey in February 2012 after we returned home from a wonderful week at Walt Disney World.  Ken and I (Deb) were sitting together watching television with the boys (Mitchell 15, Andrew 13, and Benjamin 10).   I told Ken I thought I was ready to adopt he felt the same way, and before we knew what was happening we were searching Google to find information about international adoptions.  Within twenty-four hours we were submitting an application for pre approval.  Once we were approved we submitted our formal application and God took our information and ran a hundred miles an hour.  I say that because, there were several times I wanted to stop catch my breath and run the other way.  How could I want something so bad and yet be so terrified?  I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt this is where God was calling us to, yet I had so many fears and doubts.

 Instead of running the other way, I continued to pray and ask God to lead the way.  I reminded myself the words from Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  I just had to believe, have faith that God's plans for our future were greater than any fear or doubt I could imagine.  Besides, there was a little girl waiting for us to be brave enough to step forward and become her forever family.  God has great plans for her too! 

Our precious Anna Grace was still in her birth momma's womb when we made that life changing decision, God is AMAZING!  Isaiah 49:1 "Before I was born the Lord called me; from my mother’s womb he has spoken my name." God knew she would become part of our family before she was born.  My heart aches for her birth mother and the difficult decision she must have had to make.  I pray God in all his goodness gives Anna's birth mother peace. 

If there is one thing we have learned up to this point it is patience.  I'm so thankful that we have at least had an estimate of timing for each step we've passed along the way.  Our next point of waiting is our pre approval letter.  Our letter of intent was sent on Friday and we were told it usually takes a week or two to get the pre approval.  There is a constant bit of anxiety, I'm assuming will continue until we have Anna home.  Again, we have to remain steadfast in God, "Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long." Psalm 25:5.  I tell myself everyday that God wouldn't have called us to it, if He wasn't going to carry us through it!  There are so many ugly thoughts that want to penetrate my mind, but I choose to believe God's truths and find great comfort there.


But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:33